2 Perhaps one of the most tragic misconceptions about cheating is that people stray because they have fallen out of love with their partners.We are taught to value fidelity as the litmus test of a relationship and conditioned to feel victimized if someone cheats on us.I just needed some other sex.” 5Most married people don’t cheat.

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But my research shows that young men don’t cheat because they have fallen out of love with their partners.

Rather, they cheat simply because they desire sex with someone else, even if they want to preserve their relationship.

But today, the Internet and its democratization of pornography not only make yesterday’s stigmatized bedroom activities seem mundane but also force us to ask what defines cheating. I’ve found little agreement on what counts as cheating among today’s youth. Your partner won’t stray as long as you keep your sex life exciting.

“If you’re just in some chat room [masturbating], and you are watching other people you’re chatting with, that’s not really cheating, is it? If you’re in a relationship, spicing up the physical intimacy won’t prevent cheating.

[email protected] Anderson, a sociologist at the University of Winchester, is the author of “The Monogamy Gap: Men, Love, and the Reality of Cheating.” His Web site is Valentine’s Day excitement is upon us, a time when people’s thoughts turn to romance, flowers, candle-lit dinners — and cheating?

Though this may risk spoiling the holiday, I’ve got to say it: A lot of people in relationships cheat.

Cheating and affairs are more common among the rich and less common in conservative cultures.

From golf star Tiger Woods to Republican presidential contender Newt Gingrich, cheating seems commonplace among famous and wealthy men.

Nor do more socially conservative times erase infidelity.