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Then, as things progress, you can each pick a sexy task to do. Pretend like he's there and dress up in some sexy lingerie that really puts you in the mood.

Don't forget the sexy music—and keep some lube handy, too." title="" src="data:image/gif;base64, R0l GODlh AQABAIAAAAAAAP///y H5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" data-src="https://hips.hearstapps.com/cos.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/14/25/539fd5c21823d_-_cos-02-sexy-woman-black-lingerie-md.jpg?

Instruct him to do a little striptease and masturbation for your viewing pleasure." / You might feel silly at first, but video sex has a distinct benefit over sexting or phone sex—you actually get to see each other.

Pretend like you're in the same room and after a while, you'll actually feel like you are together." / Before you start, write down 10 or more things you want to "do" with your partner—role play, dirty talk, touching, stripteases, etc.—and send these tips to each other.

If you can't find confidence in any other aspect of Skype sex, find confidence in that.

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I'm seeing a person who a) is a photographer and b) lives in a different country and c) is far more visual than me. I'm now relearning intimacy through a whole new medium. It's not like being right there with someone, but it also doesn't let your imagination run wild like phone sex or sending dirty emails; it's some whole new thing, with its own drawbacks and its own distinct pleasures. Skype sex is like watching porn that stars a person who (hopefully) you know for real, who's aware that you're watching them.

I'm still figuring it all out, but here are a few tips I've learned from my foray into this brave new world of e-humping. It's like porn you direct and co-star in, which is both exciting and nerve-wracking.

(Granted, if you're really a criminal mastermind, you could crop it out, but let's call it a deterrent.) Mostly, don't be a dick. You can always opt out of including your face in the frame.