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If you’ve only ever been in happy, healthy relationships — congratulations. Unfortunately, that is not my story, and it may not be yours, either.

Witty Conversations Spell Sexy: There’s this great John Water’s quote: “We need to make books cool again.

He’ll have my favorite snack (Swedish fish) stashed in his cupboard.

No Red Flags: I’d have to trust my gut, because it’s usually spot-on.

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I asked questions at work when I needed answers, and gave help to those who required it.

I showed affection on dates without being self-conscious, and I became open and uninhibited with my emotions.

If it were the case, then we wouldn’t spend so much time wondering if monogamy still exists, looking under our couch cushions for spare change and chivalry, or dubbing ourselves the hook up generation, would we?

Truth: I am completely addicted to dating disasters. Oh, yes, there was the junkie who cheated on me with not one, but four of our coworkers.

Perhaps, that wasn’t it at all, but then, I had no idea what was. For far too long, the only thing I was providing my partners with was baggage, and that certainly wasn’t going to make me a catch.

In order to be a desirable partner, I actually had to possess qualities that could enhance the life of someone else. Creating New Relationship Goals First, I would be trusting.

Owning Up To Past (Destructive) Relationship Behaviors After many years of research (read: dating), I learned that “demanding,” “always right,” and “severely codependent” weren’t qualities that people were looking for in a mate.