The first two messages from Arman and Jennifer that I include at the start of this article reflect this perfectly; the sense that if you’re a loner, somehow you shouldn’t want to have a friend or lover.

If you’re the type of person who feels drained after being social and you need a lot of alone time to recharge, dating can be absolutely exhausting.

You still do it because you truly don’t want to end up alone, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a struggle sometimes. Since you probably don’t go on dates very often, when you do decide to go on one, it’s a big deal.

As a loner (or the nicer term is “introvert”) myself, I can relate to these feelings – and today I want to help you out.

Being a loner and wanting to find love can feel like self-sacrilege, or at the very least extremely unsettling and uncomfortable.

Hop onto a dating site, research a local meetup group or join a forum.

There are unlimited ways to find and connect with people who might resonate with you.

Hold your self-definition loosely and allow yourself space to breathe, branch out and grow.

Perhaps your self-identification with the loner label is holding you back, or perhaps something else is.

Mostly the feelings of loneliness for me are equated with a desire for romantic partner but also other connections are missing, too.

I don’t have any friends (I don’t mean that in a light way, I really don’t have any) and I am single.

For instance, you might be using your social preferences as a guise under which you hide fear, anxiety or self-mistrust.