Perhaps you might learn that you need to have more patience or practice better communication.

You might be tempted to vent about your ex or complain about women in general after a series of bad dates.

However, your children learn how to treat people from watching how you treat people.

You need time to heal and take care of yourself, especially when you are trying to parent at the same time. You might be tempted to keep your dating a secret from the kids, at least for a while.

Now might be a good time to channel your energy towards your kids as you transition during your divorce, so you might not have a ton of energy for dating right now anyway. However, in my years as a therapist, I have found that secrets can do incredible damage to a relationship, even when well-intentioned.

Mom won’t be around anymore, so that means that if she used to encourage dad-and-daughter time or that if she would stick up and be the bad guy so you could be the good-time parent, all that is going to change.

Now, it’s going to be up to you to learn how to discipline on your own, as well as how to spend time with your kids all on your own.

I am in no rush to settle down and I am not going to make any decisions without telling you first.” Your honesty will be so crucial in helping them to feel secure in their relationship with you and their future. Yet it is crucial for you to step back and see your own role in both the relationship and the breakup.

As hard as it may be, this is the only way for you to be able to truly grow as a partner and as a parent.

After all, if her beloved dad does it, it has to be okay, right?